Hi! I appreciate the ask. Fair warning I’m not great at explaining things like this well, so please be patient with me as I try to explain my thoughts and feelings and stuff. Thanks. ❤️😅
It’s not so much that I “feel left out” of Pride month stuff. It’s not my month, so it shouldn’t really be my concern if I’m included in the celebrations one way or another. I’m really happy that people have been able to find the comfort and peace that they’ve been looking for and that sorta thing. That’s great for them, and you, and not something I’m sad about. ❤️
However, my brain hates me. 😿
A lil background on me: I’m a straight cis dude(which might be a surprise to some I guess, lol), who likes to consider himself an Ally, or at least a friend. (I’m not exactly sure what the rules and stuff are with that sorta thing or if Allyship is the sorta thing I can just claim😅) Whatever the case, I have a lot of nice friends and family in the LGBTQ+ community and stuff who I love very much. Yet… I’m just a lowly straight dude, who has complicated and often contradictory feelings, thoughts, and beliefs about stuff surrounding the community.
Then the Month of June comes along. To me, Pride month is for the Community. I’m not really part of the community, so they choose how things go with that. I want to respect that, I don’t want to intrude where I don’t belong or am not wanted. I feel like it would be wrong for me as just some guy to take up their social media bandwidth with my straight-boy nonsense. Plus my anxiety makes me worried that showing up on (predominantly LGBTQ+) social media during Pride month as some straight cis guy would make me a target for the not-so-nice people in the broader LGBTQ+ community who may not be as kind as my friends to someone like me.
So TLDR: I’m an anxious wreck, who despite being an Ally/Friend, doesn’t want to bother LGBTQ+ people on their special month, or become a target of someone who may not have kind feelings towards the kind of person they might see me as.(True on not) So I’m stressed the whole month and that makes me sad. (Like I’d never go to an event or something by myself without being invited, cuz scary)
Therefore I hide in my little sad straight boy box until July, and have basically done that every year since Pride Month started… 🥲📦
I’m sorry if things seemed weird or something. I sometimes share too much in my posts, heh, so if that was uncomfortable or something, very sorry. 😓🙏 I hope my ramblings has cleared somethings up, but feel free to ask more questions as needed or desired. 😅